Good communication between partners
Sex therapists like to say that good communication between partners is as essential to good sex as any other single thing. But the fact is that very few people really do know how to talk to their partners about sex.
"One of the most amazing things to us about sexual behavior is how reticent most people are to talk with tlleir lovers about sex .... We see plenty of couples whose well-intentioned caresses fall short of the mark because they're too much, too soon, too little, too late," William Masters, M. D., and Virginia Johnson, ofthe Masters and Johnson Institute in St. Louis, have observed.
You shouldn't beat yourself up too badly if you still feel a little sheepish and embarrassed about discussing your sexual needs. For one thing, we're simply unused to hearing people talk, with love and specifics, about sex. There are few role models whom we can emulate - there is no Jane Fonda of sexual communication. For another thing, it's hard to talk to your lover about sex without sounding like you're judging or criticizing. And then, of course, there's the enormous cultural chasm that separates men from women, which makes sexual conversations sometimes seem like a fireside chat with E. T. Add to that the fact that both men and women, for different reasons, have difficulty talking to each other about sex, and you've got a surefire setup for communications failure.
Last edited by Sexpert : 03-20-2008 at 11:25 PM.
|